Friday Story...

Hmm..Last nite I was rushing for feedback report for my staff.okiela, for their good sake, rush during my leave pun takper..one thing, I have to comment in word format coz I have prob in accessing EY website.so, as alternative, they have to printscreen the feedback page, then email me..after dat, I have to comment and return bak to them. this is for the roundtable thing..okiela..tak jadi hal..but wat I'm so mad today coz, suddenly they told me they find way for me to fixed the prob so dat i can access to ey NET and redo again thru system plak..But, i said NO, I already find the alternative and gave my comments on the staff..nak fixed prob about the sytem, tggu abis cuti kang..bukan per, my celcom broadband ni dahla slow,esp during office hour..then have to solve everything by today..dah la last nite i spent the whole nite doing the feedback comment..letihla..pastu, ingat dah abis citer..received another call saying that I have to do for another 2 staff...year end report plak..adui..baru nak tidur..haih..then now, I have to wait and wait ..wat I am so mad is..y it is soooo soooo..last minute..can u tell me earlier..give me today then expect complete by today..bengang tak..haih..

Okla..forget bout dat..I suppose to be happy today..coz my hubby will be coming back to Ipoh from cyber..weekend husband n wife kan..cant wait to c him later..hmm..he just called me just now.He told me bout his final exam for d training result. Before dat he is so damn nervous..coz he said most of his answer he was a bit unsure whether correct onot.Mana tau, end result oni 6 mistakes out of 50questions.kira hebat la tu awak..if in school, can consider it as an A:) tau..sonoknya..happy for u..he said he wanna compare with others..see who has lesser mistakes..Competitive sungguh!saper ajar ;)..hik2..rindu nyer..wohoho...

Hmm..haa..another thing, we've been searching for my baby scan photos since past 2 mths.I start realised the album missing 2 weeks before find out baby dah takder.hmm, normally I will see the photos before i go to sleep:). It is so weird I can misplaced it coz normally I will put either on the drawer next to bed or maybe in my handbag( kadang2 i bring to office :))..Cari2 mmg selongkar everything la.tak jumpa.maybe she doesnt wan me to be so so sad for her..she wan me to be ready and well prepared for not be able to see her anymore..hmm..last 2 days, I suddenly asked my mom to hide some of her "important items" below the drawer in my room(sbb she dunno where else to hide it..hihi)..bukak2 jer..she find out the album..so weird becoz last time , takde pun..maybe she thinks I am ready enuf and strong enuf to c her photos after wat had happened.mmg pun, happy sgt dapat tgk gambar baby..no tears, but a smile..miss her so MUCH. The album consist of her photos since she is 2 to 5mths inside me!

Below are her last scan photos..21 wks and 6 days..my sweet little girl. Miss u baby..

Al fatihah...Amin..

A Gift From My Heart

This is my first time ber'blog2" ni..hmm..dunno wat to say in here..I never had any diary before, ada pun ..it's a very simple diary and always doing it halfway..coz too much thing to say and feel very tired to write it all..maybe by typing here in the blog, it much more simpler and more interesting..mari kita lihat..hehe..sampai bila I can maintain this blog..kikiki..cop2..kira blog ni leh consider macam diary la kan..sort of la kan..kan awak kan..;)

Hmm..okiela.Let me start with this..

Actually, this few weeks I've been thinking to give my lovely hubby a lovely present..but I dunno what n how to buy it for him, since I'm still on confinement.Nak kena ketuk kalo kuar rumah skang ni..nak arrange for online gift delivery, he is not sure of his new office address plak..Why I wanna give him a present???

Hmm..I am so greatful n thankful for having him as my husband..A gift from God.Since we knew that our lovely daughter passed away (still in my womb) on 21st April 2009, he was there with me..all the while..accompany me to go thru this sadness together. He gave me the strenght, support, love and everything that a mother and a wife needs in order to go thru the pain of losing a baby..my First and Wonderful Baby..I know he feel d pain too. But, he didn't show his sadness just to make me smile and laugh..
Let me recall..

21 April: Find out our baby is in a Heaven..
22 - 29 April: Admitted to hospital for induce treatment. But just 1cm opening..Doc ask us to go back home for me to have a rest...
10 May: Admitted again to continue for the induce treatment..
11 May: My wonderfull little daughter born @ 12.10pm, thru normal delivery

It's been a very traumatic experience for both of us..Imagine we have to stay in the labor room since 5 am till 7pm every day for 7 days..heard baby crying..erghh..hanya Allah yg tahu..how we felt at that time..luckily, my hubby are always there with me.With him by my side, I am strong to fight this feeling..Whenever I cry, he always tell me, "our baby being take care of by angels. She made this decision to leave us because she loves us..I shouldn't cry, but shud be happy and pray for her"...lots of courage words given to me..but what I know, whenever I heard it from him..I feel so calm and so happy.Eventhough we are losing our first child, but we still have each other..our love become stronger..I love u so much dear..

No words and nothing can decribe how I appreciate all the things that you do for me all this while. But yesterday , I heard of this song..and I find out the lyrics really show how I feel towards you...At first I tot I wanna download the song for you as a gift from my heart..tapi tak reti download la pulak..so, bagi lyric jer..hope u like it..

specially dedicated to my beloved husband..

Because you love me by Celine Dion..

For all those times you stood by me
For all the truth that you made me see
For all the joy you brought to my life
For all the wrong that you made right
For every dream you made come true
For all the love I found in youI'll be forever thankful, baby

You're the one who held me up
Never let me fall
You're the one who saw me through
Through it all

You were my strength when I was weak
You were my voice when I couldn't speak
ou were my eyes when I couldn't see
You saw the best there was in me
Lifted me up when I couldn't reach
You gave me faith 'cause you believed
I'm everything I amBecause you loved me, ooh, baby

You gave me wings and made me fly
You touched my hand I could touch the sky
I lost my faith, you gave it back to me
You said no star was out of reach

You stood by me and I stood tall
I had your love, I had it all
I'm grateful for each day you gave me
Maybe, I don't know that much
But I know this much is true
I was blessed becauseI was loved by you

You were always there for me, the tender wind that carried me
The light in the dark shining your love into my life
You've been my inspiration through the lies you were the truth
My world is a better place because of you

I'm everything I am
Because you loved me

Thanks dear..